Basically

Pounding headache

Blood pumping through the veins in my head

Heart pumping blood through the veins in my head

Heart that feels slightly compressed, slightly distorted and heavy tonight.

Memories affect

Memories affect feelings

Having memories affects feelings

Not having memories...

Is not even a sane possibility.

Perhaps forgetting is the clue.

Perhaps letting bygones be bygones is the only way of making the headache-heartache go away.

But bygones have made me who I am.

Because of my past, I am my present, and imagine my future.

Because of bygones I'm stronger, more experienced, and attempt to be better.

Because of bygones I still cry in memories, wake up screaming, and stop breathing.

But they're a part of me.

Every smile, every tear, every wound, every kiss.


And I like the person I've become.